I'm Still Alive, I Promise!!

Hi, everyone!

It's Lexi. I know I've been MIA lately, but I've been working really hard on several things. That's the life of a young blogger these days, right??

So, just wanted to touch base with you all and QUICKLY update you with some thoughts and what to expect next from RFR!

First, I'm Team Teresa, y'all! Melissa and Kathy got on my nerves during last week's reunion (part 1). Plus, Caroline is a miserable geriatric, and Jacqueline needs to spend more time worrying about her family instead of Teresa. Why is it that she knows everything about Teresa's life?? Bored much, J?! Plus, Lauren is still fat. LAP-BAND was never something I thought highly off anyway because my mother had it and is still overweight....4 years later. So, expect Lauren to stay fat, people!

Also, I will be returning to blog about various reality news and RHOA, and expect to see an RFR Twitter account soon! Christina and I live far apart, but we love TV and you guys too much to not find another way to stay busy keeping you informed and entertained!

Oh! RFR has been around for a year as of this past July! Thanks for the love, guys! We appreciate it, and we hope to be around for many more years!

xoxoxoxo,

Lexi : )

Splish, Splash, Mish Mash!!

Hey Blovies!! The last few weeks are like a blur, so I'm trying something a lil' different. Let's briefly discuss all the shows so far...

Basketball Wives is FINALLY over. I regret to inform you that they have been renewed for yet another season. What's worse? They've fired Jen, Royce, & Kesha from this ratchet show. The reunion show spent a lot of time trying to save Evelyn's and Tami's reputation. Tami insists that she's not a bully. Honey Boo Boo Chile, that is all we've seen of you since you got on this show. Face it. You've embarrassed yourself, your kids, and others. Acceptance is the first step. Evelyn spouted on about setting an example for her stepdaughters. I don't understand. No, really. Don't you have to be married to have stepchildren? Chad ain't married and ain't gonna marry this midriffed skank. Done and done. Oh, and I wept when Jen and Evelyn were reunited after that Maury-esque polygraph test they were both subjected to. And by wept, I mean regurgitated.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey are up to their old tricks. Badly behaved children, comparing riches, and keeping up with the Guidices. I will admit that last year I thought Melissa and Joe Gorga were just thirsty check chasing after sister/brother in law made it big on TV. Now I know, Teresa is a crazy, spastic, brainless skeezer. It's lucky for her that she flipped that table and keeps going broke. I think America cares about her evil cupcake coiffed spawn. People don't like to see kids struggle. Milk it girl! My co-blogger, Lexi, is likely cringing at this. LOL! I can't though. I can't listen to Tre lie anymore about her personal life and situation. If you don't want us in your biz, don't record your life (scripted or not) for reality tv. I also cannot with Lauren and this diet foolishness she's on. Just let your dad get you the lap band so we don't have to discuss your weight anymore. Thanks in advance.


On Teen Mom, the girls are back at it! Teenage parenting at its finest. We started this season off right. All the babies are 2 years old now. It seems like they should be older because I feel like I've been watching Amber's train wreck of a life for much longer. She and Gary are still wasting everybody's hard earned tax dollars with their crap. As reported in earlier blogs, Amber is on her way to the big house (doesn't she look fetching in Creamsicle?). Her best efforts to avoid serving time were to no avail. She got carted off to rehab in Cali and even attempted to kill herself. I'll believe that last line as soon as I see the hospital documentation. Attention is hard to come by these days I assure you. And who's caught in the crossfire?! Leah, that's who. Meanwhile, Carly is thriving with her adoptive parents. Thank you to the good Lord. Bentley seems to be fairing well with Maci and Kyle. I can't criticize Maci in the mom department. However, I know Ryan is a douche, but its not fair that he can't have a girlfriend if Maci can have a boyfriend. She needs to layoff. Farrah is STILL crying. I know she lost her baby daddy, but I maintain that the last time we heard his voice he was calling Farrah all kinds of bitches and telling her to lose his number. PS anybody note how bad Sophia is now?? She is about like Milania on RHONJ or "Millaniac" as I call her.  Somebody save this child.

Feel free to chime in if you have anything you'd like to share or any shows you'd like to suggest I get into...your feedback is important to me. Hit me up @ christinarealityforreal@gmail.com or comment below. You can even comment anonymously if you don't want nobody checking up on ya. 'Til next time....


xoxo, Christina Rose
(Photo Source: www.gossiponthis.com)
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Jersey Jabs

Hey Blovies!! How goes it?! Welp, last week Lexi kicked it off with the ladies of Dirty Jersey! That's right, the Real Housewives of New Jersey are back. They are just the right amount of rich mixed with a little rachet! Without further ado...

Jacqueline has been having problems with Ashlee since the beginning of time. However, up until recently, Chris Laurita (Jacqie's hubby) has been unmoved by Ashlee's antics. He's bought her car after car and dealt with her bull-ish. But, this season, even HE's sick of her. Finally!! They decided last week to cart her off to boot camp with her aunt and uncle in Las Vegas.  I, personally, think Vegas is the exact wrong place to send a wild-child, Kesha-like creature like Ashlee. Thankfully, she isn't my kid. This week Albie attempted dropping Kesha's twin off at the airport, but not without hearing 1001 excuses of anxiety and depression to keep her from making the journey. The complaints fell on deaf ears.....Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Jacqie threw a family/friend gathering. No shock Ashlee missed her flight and showed up at the house expecting to be welcomed. FAIL. Chris carted dat ass back the airport and made certain she hopped her butt on that plane.

At the party, the gang was all there including Melissa & Joe Gorga, Rich and Kathy Wakile, Caroline Manzo and gang (minus Albert), and Teresa and Joe Guidice. The party seemed to be going well until Teresa brought up that damned cookbook! I have never seen a cookbook cause so much raucous. Apparently, nobody told Teresa that writing a cookbook doth not equal writing a real book. There was a big blow up about the book at last year's reunion show. Teresa slammed just about everybody mentioned earlier and tried to call it a joke. Safe to say no one laughed. That fiasco ended and the guys went downstairs for a game. Juicy Joe Guidice bragged about how awesome he is for the -enth time until he attempted to compare height with Rich Wakile. You know Rich. The greasy guy Kathy's married to. Joe took the argument too far when he reached for Rich's balls (literally) and Rich put a nice shiner right on Joe's eye. That's the moment Rich gained a lil' respect from me. He is still greasy but a tiny bit less skeazy.

In other news, Housewives gone Popstars is still in full effect over at Bravo!. Melissa is not the first and won't be the last. She has recruited some top name producers to help her with her long-awaited sure to be platinum album. I can't! Her latest single is called "How Many Times" which is aptly named because I found myself thinking, "how many times are they gonna make us listen to this crap?". I know you guys watch and have opinions too. I'd love to hear what you think of her song. We got to see where Joey G. (Gorga) works and all the buildings he owns (each one named for his children). Blah blah blah.

Anybody surprised Teresa & Joe's pizza shop is closed? Who's the top business closer, Peter (RHOA) or Joe (RHONJ)?? You be the judge.

Next week, Teresa will face off with everybody for what I'm sure is more foolishness with the raciest cookbook ever written.

'Til next time....

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: http://starcasm.net/archives/154180)
(Photo Source: http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2012/04/the-real-housewives-of-new-jersey-recap-poker-face/)

We're Going Back to DOOOITY JOOOOOOIIISSSEEEYYY!!

Welcome back to Jersey, everyone!!  The land of denial, garbage, suspected mafia activity, and the ugliest red hair dye ever!  <---Caroline, stand up!!!  LOL

Back in Jersey, it seems that Teresa's cookbook is still the topic of discussion.  I almost said "This conversation is lasting longer than Christmas did last season!" But I realize they were filming virtually non-stop last year.

When this episode began, I also realized that I don't like Caroline AND Lauren.  Lauren is turning into a carbon copy of her mom.  Why the hell is Lauren always preaching to Jacqueline about how to raise someone who is only 2-3 years younger than her?  Bitch, shut up!!  You can't possibly think you're the go-to person when it comes to raising children just because you now have a boyfriend who is your equal in doughiness. Ugh!  I wish Lauren would be a little more like Ashley in terms of having a unique personality from her mother.  We don't want or need two Caroline Manzos on TV.  NEXT!  Teresa definitely tried to mend things with Caroline, but something is really weird to me about that friendship.  I believe it has always been different since season 1 on Caroline's end.  In the beginning, Caroline loved Teresa.  She was her source of entertainment.  She thought Teresa and Joe were so cute and funny.  However, that disappeared somewhere around season two, and Teresa was still assuming it was there.  I don't know.  I think that friendship should just bite the dust.  It never was meant to be.  Move on and pass the pasta!

Personally, I'm Team Teresa all the way!!  I definitely believe that Melissa is with her brother for money.  I know that Kathy is jealous of Teresa.  Hell, even Kathy's husband talks about Teresa all the time like he's obsessed with her. Teresa may not have money at the moment, but she does have her fame.  And we all know that at the end of the day, most people just want to be relevant.  THAT'S why Melissa is on this show, right?  I mean, if she really was so much better than Teresa, she could go do anything and outshine her.  Yet, she chose to do so right next to her on this show.  That's why those idiots will never cash in on this show: they're too occupied with trying to play Teresa's game next to her.  Teresa is a beast!  She's gonna get you out of her yard at any cost. From what the previews have shown, the ladies will learn that I'm right about them and Teresa, as well. LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!!

What's up with Joe Gorga not knowing his wife would leave him if she met a richer guy?  She would peace out so fast that you would think someone set fire to a Louis Vuitton store.  That is the woman who hugged the Rolex he gave her for Christmas more than she hugged him!  She was so busy playing dress-up and "model-model" that the kids barely got camera time!  Melissa is so annoying that it hurts.  I hope she pisses glitter and it hurts her like passing kidney stones.

Also, Joe Giudice is clearly cheating on Teresa and not caring if she or the kids know.  I have never seen a man be so calm on TV when his wife tells him that his oldest daughter thinks he's unfaithful to her mother!!  I hope he goes to jail.  Teresa, don't flip tables there!  We don't want you getting tazed!  LMAO!

The shore scenes and houses were all blah and nothing important, EXCEPT the scene when Teresa's aunt told them all to shut up and act like family.  She took the words out of my mouth!  That's what they should do: stop cooking and talking shit all the time!  GO ACT LIKE A FAMILY THEN MAYBE WE'LL BELIEVE WHAT YOU SAY AND DO.  Just a thought. NEXT!

Finally, I thought it was interesting that Ashley now has blonde hair.  Hmm.....that's not a cry for help, Chris.  That's a nervous breakdown!  WTF?!?!?!?!  Anyway, this episode was kinda boring, and I expected more.  But mark my words, at the end of the day, *queue Scottish battle music* Teresa will rise again and seize your hearts and loyalty!  And she will be SCANDALOUS as she does it....mwahahahahahahaha!

Can't wait for this ride you guys!

P.S. I was happy to see Rosie.  She's always the comic relief of the show!  I hope they are paying her.  I don't want Rosie to be living with her mom forever!  LOL

(Photo source: http://www.realitywanted.com/images/upload/realhousewives/nj/4/RHNJ4-Ep1.png)

Real Drama for the Real Housewives, Again!!!

Hey Bleeples, welp, guess who's at it again?! You guessed it. Teresa and Joe Guidice just can't stay out of the spotlight...even if it is from the coppers!!! According to MSN's WonderWall, Joe has been indicted on fraud charges. See below...

 

 

 

"Joe Giudice, the husband of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" star Teresa Giudice, was indicted by a New Jersey grand jury on Tuesday on charges of fraudulently obtaining a driver's license, authorities told NorthJersey.com."

 

 

Apparently, Joe impersonated his own brother, Pietro. No surprise that Tre's little boo is in trouble again. I mean, how else does he pay for his very expensive wife and those damn flowers she puts on their little cupcakes, Gia, Gabriella, Milania, and Audriana. I know we're sure to see this on next season's already action packed RHONJ. Can't wait!! More updates as it happens.....Wanna read more about the Guidices' legal troubles click the link below.

 

 

'Til next time....

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: http://wonderwall.msn.com/tv/teresa-giudices-husband-joe-indicted-for-fraud-fake-id-1658725.story)

Jersey=All the INGREDIENCES of a HOT Mess!!!

OMG! Let me just say that this reunion was a rollercoaster!

First, Caroline immediately showed her allegiance to Melissa and Kathy and disdain for Teresa. Listen, we all know Teresa is lying! She can't say all of that stuff was just a joke. I would respect her more if she would just come out and say, "Yeah, I wrote it and meant! I was pissed that you bitches wanted to air my dirty laundry on this show. And I hate Kim G.'s granny ass!" LOL! That's what the table-flippin' Tre would have said! This brand new Teresa is a monster. I kinda came to her defense last week, but after seeing the foolishness that she will defend, I can't co-sign anything involving Teresa. HOWEVER, that means I don't like ANYONE on the show! LOL! Yes, that includes Jacqueline. That coward has been dogging Teresa on Twitter and commenting on the reunion, yet she's saying she's above the show. Jacqueline, either you're in or you're out. It's like the Mafia...ask your hubby...oops...I didn't say that. "It was a joke! You know, ha ha!" *Teresa voice* LMAO!

As far as Melissa and Teresa discussing Danielle referencing Melissa's son at the season 2 reunion, I am so confused! Why would Melissa talk about her family via Facebook with someone she doesn't know?! That just sounds like Melissa wanted to find out what gossip Teresa could have been spreading about her. And Melissa, Teresa told you to not come on the show because people would make fun of your forehead?! LMAO! I realize that was said to make Teresa look stupid, but it really made EVERYONE look 12!

The discussion of the christening is just old to me. The only interesting thing mentioned about that was when Andy Cohen read People magazine's comment calling it the worst since "The Godfather" christening. I laughed at that because I'm pretty sure every woman one that stage is close to someone delivering a "Moe Green special". Hell, that might even be a pizza on Joe Giudice's menu! HAHAHAHA!

This reunion was too easy to make fun of! They all were discussing Teresa's finances, but I am willing to bet those women probably can't produce 100% legit W-2s to justify their lifestyle. Well, Kathy probably could because her home and lifestyle seem to fit the entrepreneur career Rich has. Look at that! Another reason Kathy is just a filler on the show! Hmm... : D

I'm also going to point out how disgusting Melissa Gorga is. SHE IS FAKE!!!!! She is always crying over her dad as if someone has queued her to do so! Plus that fake praying is too much! I believe she created a character for RHONJ to top Teresa, but if not then she was possibly just heavily medicated during the reunion. *shrug*

Also, Caroline needs a muzzle. That bully just needs a new person to pick on every season. Even if she is mad at Teresa, she can't explain how she transformed that anger into a "beautiful friendship" with Kathy and Melissa. SHE DOESN'T KNOW THEM LIKE THAT ACCORDING TO HER!!! The allegiance she has to them will eventually change. It's sad a 50+ year old woman still treats friends like fashion trends.

And Joe Giudice actually thought he would get away with fraudulently obtaining a driver's license?! WHOA! LMAO! Teresa was also trying to say he did nothing wrong! SERIOUSLY?! LMAO! They are freakin' Bonnie and Clyde! They were about to go down together for bankruptcy fraud, but they dodged that bullet. I don't think Joe will get past the fraud situation though.

Oh, Melissa has to be half-Black. I noticed how she avoided that question a la NeNe Leakes with the stripper question on the first RHOA reunion. I knew I wasn't the only one out there who felt she was Italian and possibly something else! Overall, it doesn't matter. I just wanted to point out that my eyes work very well, people! Haha!

Anyway, can't wait to see what happens during part 2! I gotta go now, but if you think part 2 won't be worth watching, FUGGETABOUTIT!!!! LOL

By the way, I thoroughly enjoyed how Teresa stated that she was confused about the Brownstone. LMAO! They better watch Teresa because that bitch appears to be saying she's gonna take them all down if she goes down! LMFAO!

Later!

...And stay "calm and cool like a whistle"...ROTFLMAO!

(Photo source: http://s3.sidereel.com/episodes/1289765/featured/rhny.JPG)

My Thoughts on "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" Season 3 Finale

Well, ladies and gentlemen, the season has come to its dreaded end.....

I thought I would just share my thoughts on everything concerning the finale and show altogether.

Let me begin...

I am not a Teresa "fan", but I do think she's probably the one who brings viewers to the show. I mean, with all of her family drama being aired, how could she not? LOL! I do, however, take her side over her sister-in-law Melissa's. This episode showed Teresa gathering her parents, husband, children, her brother and sister-in-law and their children for a family photo. The photo was perfect! And from the conversations they had afterwards, I can tell there is some genuine love there. I think the problem is Teresa's brother thinks Teresa being on this show has changed her, but I think he's just angry that she's gained fame and has never tried to show him and his wife off during the previous seasons.

As for the Melissa and Teresa "rivalry", I don't think Teresa is jealous of Melissa. I think Melissa is using Teresa's hair stylist, clothing stylist, and photographers she's used for her children because she feels she can probably become famous if she surrounds herself with Teresa's stylists. She has it all wrong! I mean, if you're going to say someone is jealous of you, why would you use all of their people just to make you look more like them and give them a reason to say that you are copying them, Melissa?? In other words, even if Teresa is copying you, you aren't exactly making a case for yourself. Instead, you're giving the viewers a reason to think you're creating this image just to piss Teresa off. BE YOURSELF...if you still remember how to do that!

Ashley is just a hot mess! I don't know if I think she'll ever be productive! But I don't think she's had the best role models. Didn't her mother get drunk with her ex-boyfriend's mother during their first meeting? YES! With a mother like that, can these people honestly wonder why she is the way she is??

As for Teresa's book, I definitely think she trashed the other women. Really, she has a reason to. Caroline and the Manzo kids have been making fun of her and Joe Giudice the entire season. The comments about how many ways you can use the title of her book "Skinny Italian" to make jokes out it, the "Joe Giudice doesn't ever question if something is legal" jokes, etc. Even though she wrote this before the season aired and she had probably never seen these comments until now, I think it's good she wrote about them. They are not great friends. I don't make fun of my friends with my family and talk about their husband then later claim that I've done nothing to them when they retaliate. Now, the Manzo family is all over Twitter congratulating Melissa on that shiteous song! They didn't even know her before the show, but now they feel a friendship because they can all sit around and trash Teresa. Good behavior? I THINK NOT! And Melissa should be skeptical of them. What happens when they can't kick someone out of her house like they did Kim G.? They'll probably say she doesn't value them, yada yada yada. I don't trust the Manzo family. It seems like they speak of loyalty, but only think it applies when they are face-to-face with their friends. Loyalty exists at all times, Don Caroline!

Also, Caroline needs to stop think Teresa attacked her son Christopher. That stripper car wash idea was very stupid. If she thinks that was a cheap shot at her son, she's crazy. If anything, I think Teresa is making fun of Caroline because she's a mother who is endorsing her son's idea. I'd make fun of her, too! LOL!

If you ask me, even if Teresa is wrong on several occasions for her behavior and is having financial problems, I believe the cast is somewhat jealous of her. She's the only one who has done a major project outside of the show. She's the most famous. Think about it: If you ask anyone what they remember about the show or know about it, I'm sure Teresa's table flip and her over-the-top behavior will be in their answers.

I also think the show is picking on Teresa. I would be difficult as well if I needed the money from the show, had brought in plenty of money and viewers for them, but the show chose to air my dirty laundry and family drama by adding my family members, particularly the ones that I do not get along with, to the cast.

I can't wait to see this reunion. I know we can already expect Kathy to be silent, being the filler she is and all. LOL

See you Sunday for the Jersey brawl! I heard Teresa brought all her "bitch" and "pig" insults! : D

(Photo source: http://cdn.babble.com/family-kitchen/files/2011/08/Fabulicious_by_Teresa_Giudice.jpg)

Son of a PUNTA!

I can't believe we are now one week away from the season finale of "Real Housewives of New Jersey"! I've waited a few weeks to write about this show because I wanted to cover the Punta Cana trip in its entirety. Let's just say I know these women well enough by now to know that trips always lead to drama. LOL!

Well, here we go....

The first episode of the Punta trip was boring, in my opinion. It seemed as if everyone was too timid to actually be interesting. As usual, Caroline found a reason to bitch and blame it on some fictitious illness she was suffering from at the time. *eye roll* If you ask me, Caroline is completely transparent. I saw this drama between Caroline, Jacqueline, and Teresa brewing because "First Season Caroline" couldn't get enough of Teresa. I mean, she loved Teresa's uncanny ability to make everything about her outfits and accessories. The Caroline of this season couldn't care less about Teresa! Caroline is a very fickle person. I'm very tired of her thinking that she and her family are better than everyone else. She treats Teresa and her family members like "that annoying bunch" now. It's sad, but I'm not shocked considering how much she wants the whole show to be about how well her overly underqualified children are doing in all of their family-sponsored endeavors. Caroline, get over yourself. We all know Teresa is annoying, but so is your fam!! Take a break from standing on your pedestal.

As for Melissa, when did the world decide she was so hot?!?! That long ass chin is not a good look when it's added to the mountains of Dolce & Gabbana she covers herself in. I'm also tired of Joe Gorga acting like a sex fiend. It's not cute. I'm willing to bet when Melissa was preggo, he was screwing anything with legs. Oh, but Melissa would never tell us that because she knows we're waiting on her to fall or breaking her fight down, or whatever the fuck the lyrics to that hideous song of hers are.

Kathy, Kathy, Kathy. I'm so glad you had a moment during these past two shows where you weren't vomit-worthy. That Teresa fight actually made Kathy seem like one of the group. I still don't like her, but now I remember her as being a part of the show.

Now, as for Jacqueline, I feel sorry for her. I like her a lot, and I feel like she's always trying to help those who clearly do not want to help themselves. I have no other explanation other than that as to why she would still be taking up for Teresa at this point in the show. I was totally on her side when she was wondering why in the hell the Manzo boys and Greg would think it was a good idea to get Kathy, Teresa, and Melissa to participate in a "Punta Princess" contest they made up. At that point, I started to really dislike the Manzo boys. They are funny, but don't stir the pot then act like you did nothing (which is totally what they would have done). And Greg?? OMG! Can someone shut this "Kim G with a Penis" up?!?! He's stirring up so much shit between Teresa and Melissa! One minute, he's telling Melissa how perfect she is and that she looks better than Teresa. The next minute, he's telling Teresa he loves how she and Joe are siblings. WTF?!?! Greg is an untrustworthy queen, and I'm not amused! Shut up, Greg. When you get a vagina, we'll care what you think. I'm glad Teresa called him out in her blog for Bravo this week! Good call on that one, Tre! LOL

As for the long-awaited "On Display" performance, it was as HORRIBLE as I'd imagined it would be. Melissa is in her 30s and wanting to be like Britney Spears in the days of the snake. Britney was in her early 20s and had 3 albums under her belt at that time. Melissa has never sung on anything other than that coffee table her dad filmed her on. I think Melissa needs to realize she's not a singer, and even if she could be, she'd still be a rookie being outdone by Gaga and Beyonce. PLUS, THE BITCH CAN'T SING!!!! I was laughing at how she shamelessly lip-synched that whole performance!! IT SUCKED! At least Joe Giudice congratulated her on her performance. *shrug* But seriously, Melissa needs to stop this fake praying! Maybe someone can start a petition to ask Pope Benedict to beg her to cease with all the fake religious behavior. LOL!

Oh, and the Kathy-Teresa reconciliation wasn't believable at all. They're both self-centered, so I don't think there will be peace.

BTW, ROSIE WAS AT PERFORMANCE/LAUNCH PARTY!!!! Just had to state the obvious because Rosie is always good comic relief! LOL!

Since Sunday is the season finale, I wonder what we'll be left to ponder about until season 4....I also would love to know who Caroline is going to control on the reunion show since Jacqueline wasn't there. LOL

Gotta go, guys! See YOUS on Sunday!!

(Photo source: http://media.nj.com/entertainment_impact_tv/photo/real-housewives-of-new-jersey-recap-teresa-giudicejpg-e204eaff61f5d69c.jpg)

"JOEEE....WHY AM I LOSING FRIENDS???!!?!" *Teresa voice*

JACQUELINE LAURITA HAS HAD IT!!

As of last night, a Twitter revelation shocked many "Real Housewives of New Jersey" fans. Jacqueline Laurita, my favorite, revealed that she would not be at the reunion. She also insinuated that she might be leaving the show altogether! : (

From the rumors, it seems that Teresa caused quite a stir at the reunion (or prior to it) that rubbed Jacqueline the wrong way. However, neither of them mentioned the other in their tweets. Instead, they seem to have been replying to each other passive aggressively without the @reply feature. Jacqueline stated that she can't believe how someone could live a different life off-camera and that the fakeness of a cast member would be revealed. Later today, Teresa "replied" by saying she would never call her sister-in-law Melissa a stripper. Then, of course, Melissa replied by denying that she's ever touched the pole! LOL! OH! It gets better! It seems that in one of Teresa's tweets, she was hinting that Jacqueline had been a stripper. I believe she was referring to Jacqueline because the other housewife who is so holier-than-though Carmela Soprano style (a.k.a. Caroline Manzo) has not commented, so it couldn't have been her that Teresa was referring to! Jacqueline was the only person tweeting in-depthly about why she was moving on from the drama of it all. Teresa, learn to be more sneaky! We see right through you! Teresa probably called Melissa a former stripper, and then probably went after Jacqueline (with the same stripper accusation) for being a voice of reason.

PLUS, the real reason I feel there is beef between Teresa and Jacqueline is because Ashley tweeted Teresa saying, "You make me sick. WOW." As we all know, Ashley usually reveals the drama in all situations and has her mother's back no matter what. She went on to tweet (and later delete) that Teresa shouldn't talk about strippers because she may have to be one when her husband goes to jail! ROTFLMAO!

Oh, Ashley, or Ashlee as she is known now, thanks for always revealing things to us even when your mother is trying to be classy. We appreciate you being the antithesis of class. LMFAO!!

Can't wait for Sunday!!

(Photo source: http://blog.zap2it.com/ithappenedlastnight/real-housewives-of-new-jersey-jacqueline-laurita-kim-g.jpg)

Revenge of the Cupcakes!!!

Hi, Bleeps! This week's episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey brought us the usual Guidice shenanigans, Manzo wisecracks, and Gorga foolery. The kids stole the show this week, so we'll talk about that later. Let's get to it.....

The show began with all the families preparing to run a charity 5K event. Of course the obnoxiously greasy Wakiles show up ready to kick some ass, Teresa and Joe were late, and the Manzos find a way to make fun of the event and cheat all at the same time. Other than a few side comments on how lame Tre and Joe are, I could've done without seeing it at all.

We got to sit in on an awkward family feud conversation among Jacqueline, Caroline, and Teresa about last week's foolishness between Joe Guidice and Joey G. (Teresa's bro). Caroline made a chilling comment: "Real men don't fight over texts". I couldn't agree with her more!! I don't know any men who take the time to call each other names and trash talk via text. This whole fight just goes to the evidence that both Joes go out of their way for attention. Neither is as manly as they'd like us to believe. Anyhow, that fight naturally leads to one between Teresa and Melissa (you know, On Display, On Display, On Display). This whole family is filled with childish and untalented people. Tre and Meliss were trying to figure out if the fight would hinder Uncle Joey G from coming to Milania's 5th birthday party. We'll come back to that...

Meanwhile, at the Manzo mansion, Lauren is still down on herself for being fat. I kind of feel like we've had this discussion. Frankly, I can't feel sorry for someone complaining about being fat and not liking how she looks as she stuffs a frickin' meatball & marinara down the shaft. In this world, we have many options. One being--gastric bypass. Another being--exercise. Another? Plastic surgery. Your parents are ballers. Pay the money and shut up awready!! PS your fat boyfriend thinks your hot, ergo, live long and prosper.

Back to Milania's birthday party....she, along with her 3 sisters, and Antonia Gorga are members of the elite group called the Cupcake Brigade. The Cupcakes can be spotted throwing fits, acting spoiled, and rocking fantastically fluffy frocks. I usually don't comment too much on the kids cuz their kids, but this week they brought it upon themselves. In true Guidica fashion, Tre went all out for her favorite baby. We're talking pizza, 99 cent decor, and a homemade birthday cake. Budget free, baby! As Tre and Milania prepared for the fabulous birthday bash, Milania didn't care for the dress her toad mother chose for her. My guess is it wasn't fluffy enough. She cried and moaned until she could wear the perfect dress--pink with many, many layers--matches the pizza sauce swagg! The party went on with all Milania's obnoxious, spoiled lil' bastard friends. They demanded pizza and ran around like monsters. At cake time, things got serious. Gia, Milania's fab older sister, wanted to share something special with the group in honor of her baby sis. **Skkkkkuuuurrrrt* Does everyone in this family have some sort of talent complex?? I mean first with Gia's modeling, Teresa's cookbooks, and Melissa's singing...SPARE ME. Even though Gia's a kid and I'll likely go to hell over this....the not 1 but 2 songs she shared with us brought me to tears....the kind you cry when you're in captivity or facing uncertain pain. The lyrics included telling her parents and uncle how stupid and immature they are for this family feud. While the lyrics were, um, poignant, I think the delivery could use some work. I'll stop there. Anyhow, the episode ended with some temporary mature behavior as a result, but next week we'll be right back. Til then.....

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: www.nj.com/realhousewivesofnewjersey)

Hookah and Wine....Not always a good time!

This episode of "Real Housewives of New Jersey" was full of d-r-a-m-a that really shed some light on the Gorga/Giudice family feud. In my opinion, it seems like Joe Giudice is just an asshole (are you shocked??), and Teresa's brother is a career victim (again, are you shocked??). I can't believe Joe Gorga went to his sister's book signing just to tell her to control her husband! Then, he made it look good, too, by buying ten of her books! WTF!! Don't look like a groupie. She's your sister! Joe Giudice is right in saying that her brother is probably doing this because he wants to look good. Oh, and Joe Gorga said, "Look good for who?" Yeah, he said that into the camera. Yeah, as if we aren't watching him. Yeah, like we're also dumb. In other words, WE got played! LOL!

The other events of this episode are irrelevant. Ashley got her act together with Lauren's makeup t-shirts. Teresa showed how materialistic she truly is when she snubbed her nose at Jacqueline's $55 dress. Honestly, I wanted to slap Teresa for that! I commend Jacqueline for being frugal with her money! Teresa, take out a pen and pad because living like Jacqueline is the only way you can rebound from your situation. Just a tip! And did anyone catch how Joe revealed that he once dumped Teresa but took her back because he's a "nice guy"? HAHAHAHAHA! For the life of me, I don't know what she sees in that man!

There are two things I would like to address though: the inauthentic nature of the cast members' "businesses" and the statements they make that are too stupid and revealing to be real. First, we see Chris has a new PR business of some sort, and Albie and Chris Manzo are his employees. One problem: that shit looks like a front! LMFAO! It's a room in a family member's former home, and there is a "Microsoft Word-made" sign posted on the back wall. Do I think this business is suspicious? YES!! If I wanted to fake having a business, I think the first think I would do is make it look legit for the cameras. THE MANZO FAMILY JUST DOESN'T GIVE A FUCK!!! ROTFLMAO!!!! Second, when Joe Gorga was telling Melissa about the text messages he received from Joe Giudice (which demanded that he not go to Teresa's book signing just to make himself look good), Melissa said Giudice believes "the working man is a sucker." Is that a line from the movie "A Bronx Tale"? YES!!! Do I believe Melissa was trying to make a statement about how Joe Giudice makes his money? DEFINITELY!!! It's funny how that information came from the wife of the man who treated Albert Manzo like Don Corleone when he came to his home! LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!

THESE CAST MEMBERS ARE HILARIOUS!!!

By the way, loved seeing Rosie at Richie's party and finding out how those idiots think hookah is weed. LOL!

I'm also taking bets on how many gallons of wine Joe Giudice drinks a day!! He cracked a tooth this episode, so it's all downhill from here...in reality TV world and for us, that just means it's more to talk about! LOL!

See you Sunday, fellow TV junkies!! : )

(Photo source: http://s.mcstatic.com/thumb/6939455/19356543/4/videos/2/1/the_real_housewives_of_new_jersey_t_but_no_a_season_3.jpg?v=8)

Excuse Me, I'm Tawkin' To You!

Hi Bleepers, it's time once again to discuss the tragedy that is The Real Housewives of New Jersey! Don't get me wrong, I heart the show, but I hate the Ashleys, Kathys, and Melissas of the world....Let's dive in, shall we?!

Last week's episode left off with Ashley and Jacqueline arguing about the usual--Ashley's sorryassness. I've never seen someone so lazy act so professional at it. She really does make a career out of doing nothing and whining about it. Apparently, Ashley got the bright idea to move to LA for school, get her own house, and live it up. There are only 3 problems with this plan. Numero Uno? Don't you have to apply to school to move away and go to school?? Numero Dos? She ain't got no monies...yes, monies. Thus, purchasing a home is a no. Numero Tres? To live you must do something else besides breathe. I predict a failure in her midst, but what the hell do I know, right?! Then, she takes it a step further and lightweight calls her mama a dummy for getting married and having a baby young. Um, Ashley, you were the baby, so are you saying you'd rather not exist?? Whatever. Jacqueline swears she's tired of Ashley's disrespect and bullies her hubby into kicking Ashley out of the house. Score 1 for Jackie!! Finally, she does what is needed. I just wish she had've thrown a punch in there somewhere and it would've been perfect. Alas...Last but not least, Ashley went a'cryin to Lauren (Carolyn's no nonsense daughter) about her mom. But, if you remember correctly, Lauren has a makeup store opening soon and asked Ashley to design the t-shirt logo/design. Think she did it? You'd be right...she didn't. Lauren politely told Ashley if she can't get this design done in the week she has left, that her services would no longer be needed. She also told her that if she weren't her cousin, she'd have been fired weeks ago. Ugh...

Kathy and the Wakile clan are up to their usual...cooking food and making people eat it. She decided to throw a Middle Eastern dinner party to try out some of her catering skills on friends and family. All the ladies were invited including Teresa. But before the party started, Melissa came in running her mouth. From now on her name will be "RunTelDat" because that's exactly what she is always doing where Teresa is concerned. I can see clearly why Teresa doesn't care for her. No trust. Anyway, Melissa made sure to let Kathy know that Teresa called her hubby, Rich, a weirdo and said he might be obsessed with her. Kathy didn't take it as hard as I expected....likely because she agrees...Luckily, Melissa running her mouth didn't stop the party. Caroline, Jackie, Tre, Meliss, and Kathy ate and laughed...until Kathy pulled out the "goddess" bracelets she had for everyone. Of course, rather than just accept the gift for what it is Teresa chose to take offense the the goddess-like quality Kathy gave her. The quality was that no matter how tough times get Teresa can always put on a smile. Kathy was likely referring to Tre's money problems...more on that later. This sent Tre over the edge and got her, Meliss, and Kathy in a bit of an argument. Kathy prepared for that though...enter the belly dancers. Kathy is a character. This is the most I've ever really cared about her other than her entertaining sister, Rosie. I need more Rosie....

Now, back to Tre's money issues...we found out some intimate details on the Guidice money woes. Apparently Joe's business partner was suing both Joe and Teresa respectively. He thought he was owed by them both! I love that. A deal had taken place in which this biz partner was not present but Joe decided he would be ok with. The deal involved about $260,ooo worth suing over. Joe admitted in open court that he signed the partner's name even though he was not present. During the show commentary, Joe and Teresa were complaining about how you can't be truthful nowadays because you'll get into trouble. Uh, when you're honest about doing something illegal you will...DUH! I mean really, did they learn nothing from Casey Anthony or Bill Clinton? Never tell the truth LOL! The suit against Tre was dropped because legally she really didn't have anything to do with Joe's stupidity. But, Joe was found culpable for the money. As for their personal property? It was settled in a private sale....the buyer? Teresa Guidice. She paid the money for the suit and bought all their stuff back. Bravo must pay very, very well. Sign me up...

Next week, we can expect more family foolery and sorry Ashley sightings... Til then....

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/tv/2011/08/22/2011-08-22_real_housewives_of_new_jersey_ep14_recap_kathy_hosts_goddess_party_jacqueline_ki.html?r=entertainment)

Can we just get to the vacation from the brats?!

Let me just tell you what this episode's theme was in my opinion: "All of the children on this show are FUCKED up!"

NORMALLY, I wouldn't talk about people's children in that way, but really, I can't help it when it comes to these Jersey screw-ups! First, nobody seems to want to do anything sensible! Albie did try, I give him that. But Christopher, Lauren, and Ashley are lost causes. They aren't in school, they're doing everything on their parents' bills (C'mon! You know the Manzo family paid for Lauren to get that "beauty bar" spot in that salon!), and they have no concept of time!! Albie, you're cute. Why does ALEXA RAE JOEL of all people intimidate you?? Keep that up, and you'll be gorgeous and single forever! Throw some swag to the world!! Chris, either you do comedy or sit down. You can't make it in life with whatever it is you call yourself doing. I don't care how much Bravo is paying you to showcase your life. Lauren, you're fat. Your dad was too, but he supposedly got his stomach sewn seven different ways! DO THE SAME! Ashley, just get off your ass a little bit! You're such a dumbass you don't even realize that if you went to college, you would have the best of both words because you'd get to party and look productive since you're in school! What is wrong with their thought processes??? The irony is all the Manzo children make fun of Ashley as if they have things completely figured out. They only appear to because they don't have two separate families like Ashley does. If Caroline and Albert were to get divorced tomorrow, I'm sure Caroline would be crying about more things that make her children sad. Blah, blah, blah!

Also, Teresa's children need medication. Milania is out of control!! I blame all of those shopping sprees she was taking them on but now can't. I know she has to be aware of the fact that these kids know something has changed. Milania's worse now because she can't go in stores and get everything she wants! Let Teresa live in denial, it's not my choice place of residence.

Melissa! She is a child herself. I have a feeling she REALLY sees Joe as her father! This bitch needs Prozac ASAP! Every time Joe does something for her, she jumps up and giggles like she's 8. It's starting to look sick. That recording session was also a hot mess. She can't sing!!! I'm convinced these producers just won't tell her that because they wanted the air time. Then, to see all the other cast members tweeting the iTunes link to Melissa's song during the show was pretty sick. We get it. You're all a "family." But shit is shit! And....guess what...THAT'S SHIT!! Melissa's sister should have asked that medium if there were any platinum plaques in her future. I'm sure the dead would have laughed at that. Plus, I'm not sure what they heard was "Ant" from that "spirit." I think they really heard "ain't", as in "Ain't nobody going to buy that shiteous song!"

By the way, does Melissa ever cry real tears? She's touching her eyes, but it doesn't look like there's anything there. I'm over her. For season 4, I hope Teresa just takes her whole family to Dr. Phil and calls it a day. I want Melissa and Kathy to be replaced! I'm tired of Teresa's over-the-top family....AND ALL THOSE DAMN MEN NAMED JOE!!!

Kathy needs to also let go of this "all these men want my daughter" attitude. One drunk guy at a party hit on her. If you're that worried, make her get rid of some of the extensions and air-brushed makeup she has on. Just a thought. I never have too much to say about Kathy because I think she just wants to be on this show so badly that she's willing to create drama and scenarios to stay relevant.

Finally, the intervention with Ashley. Ashley's biological father seems like a level-headed guy. He is just as confused as I am about how Ashley is planning to go to California and demand a job in a recession, which is harder for her because she has no degree or serious skills in anything. I'm happy Chris finally spoke up and told her that he's tired of her digging in his wallet but not trying to be the best person she can be! Best moment of the show, in my opinion! I feel sorry for Jacqueline, though. She is a good mom. She probably coddled Ashley so much because she didn't want her child to have to work as hard as she did. I understand that. I just hope Ashley starts to!

Until Sunday, Jersey addicts!

(Photo source: http://www.imbringingbloggingback.com/wp-content//rhonj-ashley-crying-again.png)

Marilyn, I'm sure that wasn't the close-up you pictured!

So, this episode revealed that Ashley has gone from brat to Leonardo Da Vinci. Can this show get any more ridiculous?? After three seasons of making her seem like a bum, she's redeemed last night as talented with no direction. I don't buy it. Ashley, if you wanna draw Marilyn Monroe, at least use her as an example: WORK!!!!!!

Next, Teresa and Melissa's disaster of a playdate. OMG! Watching them try to talk to one another like there is no tension=painful! All of these insults were being thrown and laughed off! I mean, what are they, family members or high school girls who don't like the fact that they're in the same clique?? Oh, and I love how Teresa denied Melissa a place for her recipes in her new book! Ha! She really tried to make Teresa look mean for that, too! If Teresa had asked to use that studio to make an audiobook, I'm sure Melissa would have had the same reaction. They both need to grow up. And Melissa, "pork dish" can mean anything. Please tell us if it's pork tenderloin, pork chops, etc. Oh, and Teresa, please refrain from making mean jokes about the brother you claim to want a better relationship with. There's no need for that. Like I said, both of these women need to grow up, and last night proved that they are BOTH at fault!

OOOOH!!! And Teresa and Kathy with no makeup made me think it was Halloween in Jersey again! GEEZ! They look 72 without a full face of makeup! No wonder they hire professionals because there's no way they could manage to do their own makeup. They couldn't even take care of their skin for the 40+ years they've had it! LOL

Two big lies this episode: Melissa doesn't wear a lot of makeup and Rich is funny. Melissa, what the hell is wrong with you? You honestly think we believe that Teresa threatened to show pictures of you with less makeup?? What harm would come from that? That's just your way of trying to make it seem as if she is after you in every way possible. I personally think you should let her show them. People like me would probably tell you to go back to that look and save your skin the 30 years of age you're adding to it with that makeup mask you wear!

And Rich is crazy! Why did he have to use so much profanity at that party? Is that necessary? And is it really appropriate to be drunk like that in front of your children?? He's just as extra as his wife. NEXT!!

Oh, and Lauren, get over your body issues! Your family has enough money to have you bypassed and liposuctioned 10 times if you wanted that. Get some real problems! I mean, they got you a spot in that salon, right? Oh, I forgot. We're supposed to believe the Manzo family actually works. Forgive me. LOL

That New Years party was a hot mess! I mean, Kathy, who brings a baked goods gift basket to a New Years party?? NO ONE! And Joe, you're flashing your "bank roll" and saying you have 10 dollars?? Stop it. Ten dollars is probably ALL you have at this point. Go ask Teresa for a 20 because we know she's where the bread is really coming from!

Also, there was no Rosie sighting this week. However, I think Caroline tried to channel Rosie via that butch, 50s "slickback" hairstyle she wore to the New Years party! : D

Can't wait for next week!!

(Photo source: http://tvdud.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/The-Real-Housewives-of-New-Jersey1.jpg)

Same Ol' Sh**, Just a Different Year!

Hey Bleeps! Jesus' birthday is finally over, but New Year's Eve is still in effect! This week, no holiday is safe from the Jersey foolishness!

We started out this episode with a play date with the Guidice kids at the Gorgas' house. In true Teresa fashion, they were 3 hours late. I wouldn't even invite her to anything. She doesn't respect other people's time. It's hard to be TeamTre when she does rude things like this. Milania stole the show all over the place. First, she tossed her clothes everywhere and gave Teresa hell. Then, we found out from little Gino that Milania chokes him out regularly on their play dates. That kid is BAD!! She's cute. But, she's bad. Teresa calls it the "Horrible Fours". You made that up boo. The only 4 year olds I know that horrible is yours. She needs an old-fashioned butt whooping--Krispy Kreme style--best served HOT and fresh. Melissa tried to be cordial with Teresa as the kids played. By that, I mean talk nice to her, then hit her with a request to be in her next cookbook. Teresa's response: "Everybody knows that bish don't cook!" Talmbout she makes a good pork dish. Sweetheart, we don't wanna hear about your trysts with Joey Gorga. Ick. Melissa tried to bring up the Kathy thing again. That didn't go well. Teresa turns herself off to stuff and refuses to listen to anything about it. I don't really care for Melissa or her studio for her horrible voice, but I do appreciate her trying with the stubborn ass that is Teresa. SN: the Ursula comment slayed me....nobody wants to box your voice boo love!

Meanwhile, at the Laurita house, Jacqueline tries to recruit people to help her wrangle her monstrous daughter. Her dad tried to go have a chat with Ashley and talk about her interests in art....wait, Ashley has interests?? Who knew. Although, I don't forsee that going well just because Ashley never commits to anything. Artists are usually committed to their craft. The only thing this chick does regularly is fail. Later in the show, we see Lauren (Caroline's daughter) preparing for her makeup store opening. She enlisted Ashley's artistic expertise to design a company t-shirt/logo. Needless to say, Ashley failed. She drew the sketches in the car on the way there. See where I'm going with this?? It's going to take being cut off for her to finally see that life will leave your dumbass behind depending on other people to keep you clothed, fed, and so on. Lost cause!!

The pre-NYE party conversations were interesting. Melissa pulled a BBW Suzie move by running and telling Kathy what was said between her and Teresa at the play date. Kathy, Richie, Melissa, and Joe G. spent more time doing what they swear they hate doing--talking about Teresa. Stop it! It's getting pathetic. They all tried to say by the end of it that they would try to get along for the new year and all the crap you're supposed to say but you really don't mean.

It was finally time to celebrate NYE! The party got underway...we saw some ugly outfits...bad dancing...and DRAMA! Caroline revealed to Teresa that she did invite the Greasy Wakiles to the event! Ol' Tre was none too pleased with that. What I love is that her slick mouth was locked tight then...Nobody says anything to Caroline. I swear she's Carmela Soprano! Ashley tried to take shots (hello, you're only 20!!) Albie and Chris traded wisecracks....they're like the 3 stooges but with 2. Joe Guidice and Richie threatened each other openly the whole night. It was tre Italiano. In the end, everyone had a great time and Caroline gave us the Don Carmela speech on the new year!

Next week, we get to see Ashley catch the cursing out she's been begging for all season. Can't wait. Til next week...

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: http://www.exsposay.com/)

In Jersey, Jesus' birthday is soooo looooonnnngggg!!!

First of all, let me just say that I cannot believe Joe Gorga actually left his own family to go to Kathy's house! Sure. she's his cousin, but when the father he's been complaining about wants him to stay so badly but he still leaves, the problem is him rather than Teresa and his parents.

Secondly, Melissa needs to learn to be a more persuasive wife! I would have told my husband it was important to me as a mother to see my kids happy on Christmas Eve and Christmas. Antonia and Milania were soooo happy together!! It made me sad to see adults being so selfish that the kids have to suffer.

Also, Melissa is dead wrong in saying Kathy's home seemed more like home and where you can relax. If anything, Rich's stupid ass makes that gathering weird! He could not wait to press Joey for info on what happened at Teresa's home. Plus, since that was the first thing he and Kathy asked about, shouldn't that let Joe know who's REALLY doing the talking behind his back?? I'm just saying.

STOP THE PRESSES! Did anyone see Rosie this episode???? LMFAO! She looked very Bobby Flay-ish tonight since she was wearing white and in the kitchen! LMAO! Every time I see Rosie, it's like seeing something amazing at Sea World for me! Hahahaha! She's the person who needs screen time!

Now, the Manzo family. Caroline acts like she has a little crush on Joe Gorga. He's a funny guy, but he's not that spectacular! And I definitely caught Caroline imitating Teresa and Melissa when she said "Faaammmilllyyy"! Priceless! I'm not even going to talk about the Manzo bracelets because that seems like something you do with your BFFs in 5th grade.

As for Ashley, she's so ungrateful!! She didn't get her mom anything for Christmas after how Jacqueline has stuck by her supportively?? I hope I never have a daughter like that. I feel bad for Jacqueline AND Chris. He's done a lot for her, but she just pushes that fact aside.

Also, the Gorga Christmas morning was so annoying. If Joe couldn't tell at that moment that Melissa is a gold digger, then I don't know what to say! And why is she always posing and doing something stupid and ghetto?? Posing with the luggage and shoes?? FAIL! Plus, a gold Rolex? What the hell? Is this 1992?? I thought it was common knowledge to anyone who knows fashion (like she claims to) that only silver, white gold, and platinum are acceptable these days! She's so Dolce and Gabbana, but she needs to learn to be a little more Chanel! And Melissa, don't worry about not getting a "bling microphone" for you studio because you won't have any "bling records" to put "on display, on display" either! HA!

Teresa and Joe might be in bankruptcy, but you can't tell from that Christmas! Well, you could in a way because Joe looked sick because he was probably thinking about how much everything costs! LMAO. My question is if that's a small Christmas for them, then what did the Christmas gifts look like before the bankruptcy?? Hmm...

Joe Giudice is also making a lot of sense this season! I agree with everything he said about Kathy and Teresa's brother when they were discussing how Joe and Melissa left the Christmas Eve dinner early.

Kathy's husband saying he doesn't want to wear a wedding band because that makes women more attracted to him is complete bullshit! AND SHE BOUGHT THAT LIE!! That makes her Boo-Boo The Fool! She's the only woman who wants Rich. I mean, I'm still questioning if he's mentally handicapped in some way! NEXT!

The Alexa Joel scenes. Personally, I'm on to that chick. She can't sing, but seems to be using this show and the Manzo family as publicity. Caroline needs to become less amazed by her and peep her game! What the hell was that song she was singing?? She's truly like her father: neither are completely pleasing to the ear. LOL! Oh, and did anyone catch Caroline comparing her family's success to Billy Joel's??? What?! He could buy the Brownstone on his royalties alone. Caroline needs to know when she's sounding ridiculous. She can only compare herself to the other women on that show, definitely not a legitimate celebrity. Stay in your lane, boo! We're not even sure of what the Brownstone really does! I know I'm not! If anyone reading this is, then please inform me! One minute they are a banquet facility, the next they are a restaurant business that's so busy Albert can't take a vacation. Banquets aren't everyday occasions, but who am I? I think Joe Gorga kissing Albert's ring makes anyone wanna call it Genco Olive Oil! HAHAHAHAHA!

BTW, didn't it seem weird that Caroline kept using the "children of privilege" thing with Alexa and Albie, but was saying money didn't matter when it came to Vito and Lauren? Contradiction? Hell freakin' yeah!!

Finally, I'm so glad next episode ends Melissa's relentless reminders of Christmas being "Jesus' birthday." Thank you, Jesus! *sign of the cross, Melissa Gorga style* LOL!

Until my next post...

(Photo source: http://assets.nydailynews.com/img/2011/08/02/alg_housewives2.jpg)

It's STILL Christmas in Jersey!!

What up, Bleeples! So, tonight's episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey brought us some yuletide foolery as expected. I love Christmas, but I ain't never spent this long celebrating it. Every week now Melissa has uttered the phrase "It's Jesus' birthday". I am over it, Bravo. Move on.

The Gorgas jumped ship quickly at the Guidice residence this week in favor of the Wakiles' house. One word: Eww. How can anyone stand to be around Kathy's husband that much?! His greasy-ness causes my stomach to purge itself. Melissa and Joe ran to Kathy's house and went on about how much they dislike Teresa and Joe again. We do this weekly. You either like them or you don't. Choose a side. Santy Clause definitely made his way by their house. The kids were delighted with toys and goodies, but no one got more than spoiled songstress Melissa. Her hubby brings her Louis Vuitton luggage. She lets it hit the floor. That's what she thinks about your gift Joe. He gives her blingy shoes. She moves right along. He gives her a rolex. She kinda liked it. Then, the piece de resistance, he gave her a studio. I guess he didn't get the memo that she CAN'T sing!! Her having a studio is like monkeys loving peanuts or elephants loving bananas...just ain't right?! Whatever. Merry Christmas, heifer!

Christmas with the Manzos and the Lauritas is eventful as usual. This is if your definition of eventful is lame. Chris makes a failed attempt at faking the kids out that Santa is outside with his jingle bells. Albert comes home extremely late and of course missed the big fantastic family dinner. He works so hard *inserts finger in mouth*. This is all great, but I want to fast forward to Christmas morning with Jacqueline and the gang. Everybody's opening gifts and being all happy. Then, Jacqie points out that Ashley didn't buy her or Chris (her stepfather) a gift. As a matter of fact, she hasn't bought a mother's day, father's day, birthday, or any other day gift in forever. When asked about that,Ashley lets us all know that she hasn't bought a gift because she spent money on fixing up her car. Her car?! You mean the one your stepfather bought for you?? Uh huh. This really highlights the level of selfishness and disdain this trick really has for those who take care of her. Bish would get a gift from me half past never...especially Christmas. We give to get 'round here. You lose.

Over at the Guidice household, Christmas gets a delayed start. Joe, the bitter don, doesn't want to get out of bed. My guess is that because they are broke he wasn't in a real rush to disappoint his kids on Christmas morning. Meanwhile, his wife is still knee deep in the pretend land of money trees and happy christmases. All the adorable little G kids run to the tree and see all of 5 gifts under the tree. Hell, they got 4 kids?! Ok, lemme stop judging. Christmas ain't about gifts right?? I wish somebody would explain that to the kid in me who would've wrecked the building at that pitiful sight. Anyway, the kids still seemed to enjoy their Christmas. Tre gave her hubby a dog tag or something. Couldn't have been more than $10. Probably the kind of gift Joe was trying to avoid. Of course, Tre brings up her brother leaving the night before. I really wish they would both just grow up and realize that nobody cares about this foolisness...not even THEM?! Drop it.

Lastly, we caught a glimpse of the mighty Manzos doing a lil schmoozing of their own. I thought everybody bowed to them. Enter Christie Brinkley and Alexa Ray Joel. Ever wanna humble the Manzos? Sit them at the table with these ladies. We watched endlessly as Albie nervously twitched about at the sight of potential love interest. Caroline practically groveled at the chick's feet. I never woulda guessed it. She is desperate to have this girl in her family. Um, I hate to be the one to do this but uh...while Caroline went on about how Alexa Ray's got it together and would be great for Albie....isn't she the one who tried to off herself? Albie has a learning disability and got kicked out of law school. They are both clearly unstable and would not be good for each other...whether Caroline likes it or not. What the hell do I know though, right?! This probably ain't the last of the Joels...we'll see if I'm right.

I can't talk much about Kathy's family because I don't really care for them. I think Ashley could learn a thing or two from Kathy's kids on the art of gift giving and not being a selfish brat. But, I would like to know how much money they're getting a month in allowance. And, I would like to know how getting their mom a laptop is going to boost her catering business. If you have any answers, please share. 'Til next time...

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: http://www.bravotv.com/)

JOOOOOEEEEE!!!!!!

Teresa Giudice is not a happy camper! About 6 hours ago via her Twitter account, she expressed her anger at Bravo for editing the blog she wrote for the site.

She provided a link (http://www.celebuzz.com/2011-07-25/teresa-giudice-clearing-up-drama-caused-by-fame-whore-family-members/) to the blog that she feels gives an unedited, accurate account of the events on Sunday night's episode.

I have not read the Bravo blog, but I did read the one from the above link. It seems that Teresa is saying Lysa, Melissa's sister, is lying when she claims she was punched in the face by Joe Giudice's mother. I have to say that I believe Teresa is telling the truth on this one. Melissa's sisters seem grubby and ridiculous. After all, they do feed Melissa's massive ego to an unhealthy extent.

The rest of the blog discusses the importance of family, how much she wants to work things out with her brother, blah, blah, blah, blah! I swear, I have never in my life seen a group of people more hell-bent on defending their definition of "family." Frankly, if being a family is this difficult for them, they need to break up because I'm starting to feel like I'm watching the Ronnie/Sam "Jersey Shore" drama.

Man, that state knows how to amp up the trash!!

(Photo source: http://www.celebuzz.com/2011-07-25/teresa-giudice-clearing-up-drama-caused-by-fame-whore-family-members/)

Cupcakes N' Christmas Slaves, er, Sleighs!

The Real Housewives of New Jersey continued this week with the epic battle that rages on between Teresa and Kim G. Lemme take this time to also note that Kim G is not even a cast member...Christmas time in Franklin Lakes is not only colorful. It's dangerous!

Last Week, Melissa & Joe were busy kicking Monica Chacon out of their party while Kim G put up a fuss. This week, we see Monica shuffling on out the door while her beloved friend Kim watched the door closed. Forgive me, but isn't it protocol if not courteous to leave with your guest if he or she is getting put out?! Well, shame on Kim for not doing that, but then again what else could we expect from a low life duck face like her?

They go on with the party as Jacqueline flaunts the power of family with Teresa and Caroline in front of Kim G. Joe Gorga is being his usual self and sandwiched betwixt several ladies bosoms. Then, we catch Albert Manzo slide into the party all fashionably late. That's when things turn up a bit...Was I the only one thinking how incredibly mafioso for him to come in so smoothly and Joe Gorga's already up his ass and fixing him a glass of "the best wine we got" before he's in the door completely. I've never known thugs in the 'hood to kiss their boy's hand when they enter a room...Yep, only Scarface n'em. Anyway, Caroline decided she didn't like Kim G's behavior and would confront her on it. 2 seconds in her goon sons swoop in and usher Kim outta there like she was in a mosh pit. As if it weren't mob enough to throw someone out of someone else's house, they also kicked her bodyguard out too. But that shocking thing for me is that after throwing Kim out, Chris cried?! Only mobsters can cry and not have the street cred card revoked. He cried because he manhandled his best friend's ma for God's sake! No words could describe how entertained I was.

Meanwhile, our resident filler, Kathy, served her purpose. Actually, her mom and sister were the real entertainment. Not only did we learn about Teresa's family history, we also got a good lesson on how to make nasty Christmas food. Those food balls on the table were barf-tastic. It was definitely a greasy Christmas! Rosie educated us on Teresa's dad's name...Giacinto (pronounced Ja-jinto?). Uh uh. We'll stick with Gino....coincidentally Melissa's son's name...and Gia, Teresa's daughter, is likely named for him as well. Aside from Rosie looking man-ified...I can find nothing else worth discussing in Kathy's world.

The Manzo/Laurita clan continue on their journey of taking over the world. Caroline's radio show seems to be taking off. People are actually calling in. Too bad most of them are people Caroline knows personally and probably says this crap to regularly. Her brother, Chris, also Jacqueline's hubby, called in for advice on making Ashley feel more included in the family. Here's some advice: stop buying her any and every thing she wants without earning it first. Start making her be responsible instead of asking. Let her find out the hard way. Caroline didn't give him anything...instead she just praised him for what he's done...yawn. But, later at their Christmas gathering, I loved the slapstick comedy a la the Manzo brothers. They roasted dear ol' Santa. Among all his other names, we can now add "classless bum" and "slave driver" to the list. They cited both the fact that Santa only works one day of the year and the fact that the elves are the ones making the toys to add to their slave driver point. I have to say, I agree. **shrug**

Finally, the Guidices were up to their usual of family fueding and uncomfortable gatherings. Teresa and Melissa are both guilty of making their kids wear some of the fluffiest clothes. Poor Audriana really did look like a cupcake (thanks, Lex!). And even though Milania is bad as hell, she is smart as a tack. She pointed out immediately that the sad excuse for Santa was indeed her "Nona" and not the real deal. In a word, FAIL. And in true Theresa fashion, she chastised Melissa for appropriate dressing as she walked around with only her butt cheeks covered. Double standard, much? Whateva, Tre! PS tell your hubby that before he goes on about how someone looks like a raccoon, he should prolly check on her Dwarf Certification. I think its time for a renewal. 'Til next time...

xoxo, Christina Rose

(Photo Source: http://poponthepop.com/2011/07/real-housewives-of-new-jersey-recap-christmas-jersey-style/)

Ducks and Raccoons, all under the Christmas moon!!

Tonight's episode of "Real Housewives of New Jersey" picked up where the last left off: the eviction of "duck-lipped" (Thanks for that, Teresa!) Kim G.! Finally, someone was able to remove this cockroach in Louboutins and pearls! However, it was the most unlikely two people: the Manzo brothers, Christopher and Albie. I didn't even know they had it in them! LOL!

As far as why they did it, I can support that. However, just because Caroline and Kim G. are fighting, that didn't give them the right to kick Kim out of the party. Why? Because it wasn't their home they were kicking her out of! If they wanted to just start a huge fight and set the place on fire with insults and attacks, that's one thing. They took the "Get outta here!" road, though. That was a little uncalled for, even though I hate Kim. Regardless, I can't say I blame Caroline for telling Kim off. She did come there with the intention of hurting Teresa and her brother. Kim is truly this season's Danielle Staub. She even came to the party with a bodyguard. I don't trust Kim as far as I can throw her! But maybe she could have avoided some of that embarrassment of being thrown out had she arrived to the party on time. That being said, Kim needs to listen to the other Kim in ATL, "Don't be tardy for the party!" LOL!

Next on the list is the radio show. I understand that Caroline has become a well-known personality because of this show, but her radio show is PITIFUL! Even when her brother called in to the show, it was touching but not enough to win me over. And more importantly, WHY ARE SO MANY PEOPLE CRASHING THIS TV SHOW?!? Who is Kim G.?? Who is Dolores?? Bravo is making so many non-cast members famous! Geez!!

And...Christmas Eve at the Giudice home! First of all, Teresa needs to let those little girls wear casual clothes. Audriana looked like a cupcake tonight in that horrible baby-sized prom dress replica. Ten years from now, that little girl is going to see that show and want to punch Teresa in the face! LOL! Also, Joe Gorga needs to get over that whole "Everyone is talking about me and the christening, so I don't want to be around the Giudice family" thing. Of course, they are talking! I'm not even family, but I'm talking! LOL! And he would rather go to Kathy's home as if she's not talking? She's probably talking the most!! Delusion, delusion, Joe.

Oh! And did anyone else catch the epic moment of Joe Giudice LOUDLY calling Melissa a raccoon-faced witch?? LMAO! It's so true! Why is she always wearing that much eye make-up when her eyes are already HUGE?? Don't worry, Melissa, we are not missing those peepers of yours!! : D

Person to watch though: Kathy's sister, Rosie. You know, the "manly" chick with the black Kangol hat. OMG! Is she Rosie O'Donnell or the butch chick from "Bridesmaids"?? LOL! I just need to know! Bravo, what's the deal there?? LOL

Until next time.....

(Photo source: http://realitytea.realitytea.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/new-uploads/2011/07/Melissa_KimG_Christmas-Party.jpg)